The Oscars and The Razzies - Betting Odds on Tonight's Big Winners

It’s that time of year again when the bad and the beautiful of Hollywood, beg, borrow or steal some posh frocks, sit staring at a stage and reward their peers for basically doing nothing more than their ridiculously well-paid job.  Yes, it’s the 83rd Annual Academy Awards, known to us mere mortals as The Oscars. 

If anyone has ever actually bothered to stay up and watch the duration of the show, they’ll know it’s one of the most boring events on TV.  So what better way to liven it up than with a string of side bets on the awards themselves, and we kind people at SBR are on hand to guide you through the Academy Award betting picks.  

For your consideration then…Don’t bet on any acceptance speeches going on far too long as nowadays each winner has just 45 seconds to thank their partner, their friends, the director, the producer, y’know the fans, God, a dead relative, a live relative, a sick friend, the pool cleaner, the Academy itself, the grip, the gaffer, the guy who did that thing with the thing, and someone they met earlier in the evening….before bursting into tears. 

The safest bet of the night is to get behind The (quite brilliant) Kings Speech.  It’s up for several awards, including Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor, Best Supporting Actress, Best Supporting Actor, and Best Original Screenplay.  It’s unlikely that the film will sweep the board, but it should pick up a handful of statues.  Leader of the pack is Colin (terribly nice) Firth, who’s the closest thing to a sure thing for his role as the British Royal Stammerer.  It’s a triple box tick for Firth, as he deserved an award last year for his role in A Single Man, his character had an impediment, and the film is audience-friendly.  Whatever odds you can get on Firth (check the SBR forum for the most up-to-date) try and stick an accumulator on Oscar host and fellow nominee James Franco (up for Best Actor for Arm Chopping drama 127 Hours) give the performance of the night as he smiles when Firth’s name is read out.  

Colin Firth is at 1/100 with Victor Chandler, 1/50 with Ladbrokes and 1/66 with Paddy power. 

Although lots of people are talking up Helena Bonham Carter’s chances of getting the Best Supporting Actress gong (The King’s Speech again), you might do better to invest in this year's youngest nominee, Hailee Steinfeld (a mere 14 years old), who’s nominated in the Best Supporting Actress category for her role in True Grit.  

It’s been 27 Years since the Oscars was ever really entertaining when ‘Oscar Streaker’, Robert Opel, appeared naked onstage behind host David Niven.  Ever the professional, Niven merely raised a single impeccable eyebrow and deadpanned, “Isn't it fascinating to think that probably the only laugh that man will ever get in his life is by stripping off and showing his shortcomings?” (Considering the year Charlie Sheen has been having already, see if you can have a punt on Mr Sheen doing “an Opel.”)

A good shout for the Best Supporting Actor is Christian you-and-me-are-over-professionally Bale, who’s up for his crack addict skinny man role in The Fighter. The Balester has done plenty of big acting and really put the hours in by losing weight (usually a big hit with the Academy).

The other dead cert is that Toy Story 3 will win Best Animation, so much so that the award should really just be named Best Pixar.  For Best Actress, I’d be tempted to go for Natalie Portman after her head-turning role in Black Swan, but feel the “other” lesbian role is more likely to get the nod.  Annette (9/2) Bening’s safe lesbian matriarch nominee (from The Kids Are Alright) is more Oscar-friendly than Portman’s bonkers ballerina (1/12 at most bookies).  

Credit where credit is due…

Aaron Sorkin should win an Oscar for his script for the social network, Darren Aronofsky should win Best Director for Black Swan, and Gasland should win Best Documentary (although considering the Academy preferred Dances with Wolves to Goodfellas (1990), and Ordinary People to Raging Bull, should win doesn’t necessarily mean will win...which makes placing a bet all the more fun).

Away from the false smiles, hyperbole and backslapping of the Oscars, the real fun of the night is across town at the GOLDEN RASPBERRIES (aka, the Razzies). Now in its 31st year, the Razzies reward the dire and awful of Hollywood, the nightmares from the dream factories, and it’s sooo much more fun to watch.  

Up for Worst Picture are: The Bounty Hunter (awful); The Last Airbender (unintentionally hysterical); Sex & the City #2 (offensive); Twilight Saga: Eclipse (Pitiful); and Vampires Suck (a dead horse from the Scary Movie stables).  BetEd has the contenders at The Last Airbender -300, Sex and The City 2 +400, The Twilight Saga: Eclipse +600, Vampires Suck +800  and the Bounty Hunter +1000 My money goes on SATC2, because despite its stinker status, it made money at the box office - and the Razzies are an opportunity for the judges to reprimand the cinema-going audience. 

Mr Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher, should get a Razzie for Worst Actor (on general principles) for his “work” in The Killers and Valentine’s Day.  Worst script HAS to go to The Last Airbender, simply because “Bender” in British lexicography is a disparaging slang word for homosexual, and the film contains lines like: “If you want to be a bender, you have to let go of fear”; "I could tell at once that you were a bender"; and "There are some really powerful benders in the Northern Water Zone." 

Prediction:  It’s going to be a big night for The King’s Speech and for Benders!

Sportsbooks have their boards loaded with choices, giving both ‘chalk’ and ‘dog’ players a big menu of action to pick from.BookMaker and 5Dimes are running some of the best Oscars odds.